I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
