It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
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