hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
