are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
They should really pass out barf bags in church
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
