as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
