Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Randomize
