Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
