Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
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