After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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