Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
