mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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