Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
