butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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