You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
