i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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