theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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