No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Randomize
