I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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