its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
