We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
