thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
this just has baby written all over it
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
