are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
