There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Randomize
