i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I have already put on my inside pants.
Randomize
