So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
These tits shall not be calmed
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
