i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
it was like eating out sand paper
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Randomize