why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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