Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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