ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
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