called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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