My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Acid is not a monday night drug
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
