so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
