we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
