If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
