im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize