Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize