About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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