Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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