So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
are you so shy because you have an std?
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
