Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Brb crying the tears of my youth
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Randomize
