Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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