do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
