So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
