Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
