I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
