i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
