in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
