and next time when you feel me up, do it right
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
