U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
