thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Randomize